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Dealing with grief the natural way

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Molly Pickett, Assistant Director and Grief Specialist at Tamarack Grief Resource Center (left), participates in a candle-lighting ceremony where candles are lit to honor the memory of the deceased. At the camps, in the evening, a campfire ritual begins with a candle-lighting ceremony offering an opportunity for each individual to light a candle silently, or with a name or with a story. Once the candles are lit, the group leans down together to light the campfire and discussion may continue, proceeding to thoughts and memories of loved ones and each person’s experience with grief. Then come the snacks, the guitars and the music, and the mood begins to shift to the here and now and to creating new memories of times with supportive others.
Molly Pickett, Assistant Director and Grief Specialist at Tamarack Grief Resource Center (left), participates in a candle-lighting ceremony where candles are lit to honor the memory of the deceased. At the camps, in the evening, a campfire ritual begins with a candle-lighting ceremony offering an opportunity for each individual to light a candle silently, or with a name or with a story. Once the candles are lit, the group leans down together to light the campfire and discussion may continue, proceeding to thoughts and memories of loved ones and each person’s experience with grief. Then come the snacks, the guitars and the music, and the mood begins to shift to the here and now and to creating new memories of times with supportive others.
Dr. Tina Barrett, co-founder and executive director of Tamarack Grief Resource Center in Missoula. Barrett is a nationally respected specialist in outdoor-based grief support programs.
Dr. Tina Barrett, co-founder and executive director of Tamarack Grief Resource Center in Missoula. Barrett is a nationally respected specialist in outdoor-based grief support programs.

 

By Michael Howell

Grief over the death of a loved one is something every human being will have to experience in his or her lifetime. It is a naturally occurring human response to loss. But getting through it can be difficult. It can become disabling, even overwhelming, and leave a person feeling like they are drowning in a dark sea. Without some sort of help in those situations a person, even a generally healthy person, can succumb to hopelessness and despair.

According to Tina Barrett, EdD, co-founder and executive director of Tamarack Grief Resource Center (Tamarack) in Missoula, there is no single solution for helping someone through the grief process. Every person is different, every person is unique, and there are a myriad of pathways through the labyrinth of grief. At Tamarack the staff works hard to provide every sort of opportunity for healing and they offer it to people of all ages.

Founded in 2008, Tamarack has become the most comprehensive grief resource center in Western Montana. Its grief specialists offer individual, couple, family and group counseling services for people of all ages and backgrounds.

The non-profit center also specializes in “bereavement camps” for youth, teens and adults that focus on the healing power of nature and the outdoors. Dr. Barrett is a nationally respected specialist in outdoor-based grief support programs.

Some of the programs developed under her direction include “A Camp to Remember” Day Camp; “A Camp to Remember” Flathead Youth Camp; and “A Camp to Remember” Family Camp. Tamarack also sponsors a Women’s Rendezvous at Flathead Lake, a Men’s River Retreat in the Missoula area, a Teen Wild Retreat, and Mini-Camps in Missoula and Kalispell.

“A Camp to Remember” Youth Camp at Flathead Lake, established in 1997, is celebrating its 20th anniversary. It offers kids from the ages of 8 to 13 years old unique opportunities for grief work and commemorative activities. Under the guidance of professionals with expertise in bereavement and outdoor activities, grieving and remembering are balanced with a healthy dose of traditional camp fun: swimming, canoeing, kayaking, campfires, games, singing, arts and crafts, treasure hunts, nature walks, and “secret pals.”

Tamarack also sponsors a Peers-As-Leaders (PALs) program. Many campers return year after year, acting as mentors to those attending camp for the first time. Experienced campers in high school can participate as PALs, helping out with younger campers. They do such things as supervising youth cabins during staff council, reading to campers at night, teaching campfire songs, mentoring a young “buddy” at meals or in activities, organizing arts and crafts workshops, leading active games, preparing camp rituals, and assisting with meal preparation. It is a great opportunity to develop leadership skills.

To become a PAL a teen must be a responsible, enthusiastic, positive role model with strong leadership skills and past Tamarack camp or teen retreat experience.

Camps and overnight retreats have also been developed for adult women and men. Mini-camps for elementary aged kids that can be hosted in any community are also being developed.

Tamarack also offers urgent response counseling to schools and agencies and through its Grief Institute it provides education and training for the whole community in dealing with issues related to grief. It offers interactive, informational community workshops and professional seminars throughout the region.

Dr. Barrett is especially excited about the center’s new location. Still in Missoula, Tamarack has moved from its location on busy Orange Street to a quieter spot at 405 S. 1st Street W, near the river. Formerly a private residence, the historic building is very warm and inviting. It has much more space than the former building for conference rooms and private counseling rooms as well as room for a gathering of parents and children. It has a small yard and a garden. It has ample parking and is a short walk from the downtown. A grand opening celebration of the move is planned for June 21 from 5:30 to 7 p.m.

Tamarack Grief Resource Center serves all of western Montana, including the Bitterroot Valley. Tamarack also has grief specialists working in Kalispell and Browning. Anyone wanting more information about the grief resource center can call 541-8472 or visit the website: TamarackGriefResourceCenter.org.

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  1. Helen says

    I really like the idea of exploring the nature of grief in conjunction with our human ways of coping. Grief is too often suppressed instead of absorbed. I do believe that grief can be absorbed because we don’t really get rid of it, but it will still affect us when we no longer feel it. I think natural grief is good for our souls, in fact. I just wanted to add one point which I found interesting in a different article which talked about different kinds of grief. We often pair grief with death, but we can also grieve change. It is perhaps harder to understand that kind of grief because it is less remarkable. However, the coping methods are the same.